Tag Archives: gay marriage

Millions of American gay couples now scrambling for excuses not to get married

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Following the US Supreme Court ruling to legalise gay marriage, same-sex couples across the country are now having to quickly make up new excuses for why they aren’t going to tie the knot in the near future. Until today, they could easily sidestep the question by shaking an angry fist at their oppressive government. Now that the USA has finally pulled ahead of the likes of China and Turkey in civil rights, American gay men and women will need to be more creative with their excuses, like claiming that deep down they are homophobes who couldn’t bring themselves to accept gay marriage, or that they’re trying to avoid all the mistakes their parents made.

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Germans accuse UK of being too conservative with gay marriage law

Parliament’s decision to afford homosexuals the same right to a lifetime of misery as heterosexuals has come under fire by the populace of Germany, where bestiality is allowed as long as the animal in question is obviously into it. Zoophiles in Berlin, already protesting against the introduction of anti-bestiality laws, initially welcomed the new UK legislation passed yesterday as a result of politicians running out of excuses for their homophobia. However, this sentiment quickly changed on realising that the UK is still woefully lacking in drug laws and rights for transgendered individuals or those romantically involved with animals, despite considering itself a nation of animal lovers. 50 zoophile advocates gathered at Berlin Zoo this morning in protesting for a revision of the Marriage (Same Sex Couples) Bill, which ended with police arresting several people for violation of the zoo’s “No Petting” signs.

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